Coming Home
by FranklyCatty
Summary: Katniss returns back to District 12. Will she ever return to her former self? I will most likely write a part 2 to this if it is liked, so comment :)
1. Chapter 1

Consuming the entirety of her stomach, a pit of nerves grew increasing stronger as District 12's woods filled the windows of the speeding train. The woods that were etched forever into her mind whizzing past. She was almost home, each second that past, one second closer to being in his arms.

"Tell him everything, don't block your family out. Don't end up like me, Sweetheart." Haymitch told his victor, another bit of advice he vowed to give as his victor learned to survive outside of the Arena.

"And if he doesn't take me back?" Katniss asked fearfully.

"He won't. If he cares for you even half as much as you care for him, he will take you back without hesitation." Haymitch consoled.

"Big smile, dear." Effie appeared behind Katniss, her usual giddy composure slightly dampened.

"I want to help carry his casket." Katniss suddenly decided. With a nod of approval, Haymitch led Katniss to the next car which held several Peacekeepers and a clumsily assembled wooden casket. Katniss moved to a wooden handle at the front, and the Peacekeeper vacated his previous post. Hitting Katniss with it's blinding sunlight, the doors slid open revealing the side view of the crowd awaiting their victor. Katniss stepped forward beginning the procession towards the small roped off section that held the Melark family.

Silence filled District 12, save the few sniffles of Peeta's loved ones as the casket was carried, then gently laid at Peeta's mother's feet. Then, one by one, everyone offered a three fingered salute to their deceased tribute. Peeta's mother crumbled at his casket, and one of his brothers tried to aid her grief. Peeta's father, however, turned to Katniss and gave her a weary smile.

"Thank you for bringing my boy home." He told her softly giving her left shoulder a steady squeeze.

"I'm sorry for your loss." Was all Katniss could offer.

Two blond braids quickly caught her eye, and before Katniss could process her actions, she was pulling Prim close to her body, unwilling to release her sister.

"I missed you." Prim told Katniss through tears.

"Not as much as I missed you, Little Duck." Katniss answered pulling her camera smile for her little sister as she released Prim.

"Hello, dear." Her mother smiled, and Katniss accepted a small hug from her.

"Hey, Cus." Gale smiled, his voice rough and his face as if he hadn't slept in several weeks.

"'Cus'?" Katniss asked as she fell into his arms.

"I'll tell you later." Gale answered whispered into her hair so nobody could see his lips move before setting her feet firmly on the ground.

"Gale, I'm-" Katniss began, unsure of how to apologize for everything.

"Excited to see your new home? Me too." Gale interjected quickly before Katniss could say anything to displease the Capital as his eyes sternly told her 'not now'. Nodding, Katniss pulled Prim close to her body and allowed two Peacekeepers lead her to her new home.

"Gale, Mom and I brought some boxes over this morning, but we haven't gone inside yet, we wanted to wait for you to do that. But we will have a huge feast with bakery bread and turkey and green beans!" Prim babbled excitedly with Vick, Rory and Posy interjecting at every possible moment. The buzz of their voices kept Katniss walking with a soft smile forced on her lips, a smile she was sure Effie would have been proud of. About halfway thru their journey to the Victor's Village, Gale's hand found Katniss' giving her enough support for her to climb the steps into the Capital styled house.

Prim, Vick, Rory and Posy stood in the entrance way in awe before beginning their investigation of the new home. Hazelle and Mrs. Everdeene picked up a box from the porch before finding the kitchen and beginning the feast that was promised. Katniss, however, stood at the entrance way unable to move.

"Catnip?" Gale asked worriedly.

"It's the Capital. Don't you see?" Katniss asked looking towards Gale as he gave her a blank and confused look, "I don't get to leave. Ever."

Recognition dawned on Gale, and he pulled her into his arms holding her tight to his body. A sob exited her body and seconds later, she had crumbled into his body. So he held her in the entrance way as she cried for the first time since the games. When the tears subsided, he continued to hold her until the fragrances of dinner pulled a growl from her stomach.

"Come on, Catnip. Let's get that make up off and go to dinner." Gale suggested standing up from his seated positing against the wall and pulling Katniss to her feet. Nodding, Katniss removed the tears from her cheeks with the palms of her hands before following Gale to the nearest bathroom.

If anyone had seen her melt down earlier, nobody mentioned it as joyous chatter filled the table. Katniss' hand, unpronounced to her, found Gale's hand under the table, and quickly realized that his familiar hand was very comforting to her.

"What was the Capital like?" Prim finally asked near the end of the meal. The question froze Katniss' body as her brain flashed to everything that happened at her stay in the Capital.

"Are those new bows, Prim? I don't remember seeing them before." Gale asked trying to defuse Prim's question.

"You have seen these ribbons, silly." Prim told Gale unknowing of his intentions.

"Um, it was very big. And everyone wears lots of colors." Katniss answered.

"Bet they had really good food." Rory chimed in.

"Different food. But, yes it was good." Katniss answered remembering the sickening amount of food she saw on the table for every meal in the Capital.

"Were you scared when they lit you on fire?" Vick asked.

"Ok, its time for desert!" Hazelle silenced the eager children carrying a bar of chocolate to the table pulling 'ooh's and 'mm's from the table. Gale broke off slightly larger chunks of chocolate for the kids while splitting the rest of the bar in four even pieces and handing them to Mrs. Everdeenee, Hazelle, Katniss and one for himself. Silence filled the table as everyone savored their small piece of chocolate, and Katniss gave Hazelle an inaudible 'thank you'.

"Let's review the rules one more time." Gale told the kids and Katniss as they prepared to play 'hide and go seek'.

"Rory, where are the off limits?" Gale asked in his best military voice.

"Outside and the bathroom, sir!" Rory shouted back.

"Good. Prim, what will happen if you are the first one found?" Gale asked rounding on Prim's giddy features.

"You will be subjected to a tickle torture, sir!" Prim answered in a voice similar to Rory's.

"Vick, what do you do if you find someone?" Gale asked.

"Tag them, sir." Vick yelled.

"Excellent, and what do you do when you are tagged, Posy?" Gale stooped on one knee to be closer to eye level to Posy.

"Find the others!" Posy shouted gleefully.

"Very well," Gale covered his eyes, "One!" Everyone scattered leaving Gale to count to twenty with his eyes shut. Deeming it the best area to hide, the kids dashed upstairs to find hiding places while found herself locking herself behind a large oak door. She could hardly hear Gale counting now, and smiling to herself, she turned around to find a good hiding place when she met a painting of a man with paper-white hair and a set of thick lips that pulled across his face in perfect detail.

Panic arouse in her making it very difficult to breath as she stared into his eyes unable to move. It was yet another reminder of how she was never able to leave her captivity of the games. How she was back in District 12, but could never go home. Snow's last words, a threat against her loved ones, sinking deep into her mind.

Suddenly all she could think about was getting out of the room, and she began pulling on the door with all her might, but no matter how hard she tried, the door would not move. Her body felt as if it was being compressed the more she tried to open the door until it sprung open pushing Katniss to the floor. Arms grabbed at her, and she began clawing at them desperately trying to rid her body of the attacker.

"Katniss! It's me, it's me." Her attacker told her in Gale's voice. Confused, she turned her body to see Gale's very worried face staring at her, his arms holding her where her attacker had. Seeing Gale's body next to hers, her breathing slowed and her grip on his arms relaxed.

"What happened?" Gale asked clearly unsettled by Katniss' outburst.

"Snow." Katniss answered not daring to look at the picture of the president on the wall behind her. "I thought you were… something else."

Gale nodded, and as his eyes found the portrait of Snow his face clouded with rage. He stood, walked to the painting, ripped it off the wall and began to shredded it over the fireplace with his hunting knife that he carried. When he was satisfied with the small scraps of canvas, he found a match on the mantle, lit the canvas, and watched the pieces slowly burn. When they were nothing but black bits of cloth, Gale helped Katniss to her feet, silently walked her thru the oak doors, and shut them.

"As long as I am by your side, he can't hurt you. I promise." Gale whispered before firmly pressing his lips to her forehead to seal the pact. She pressed her body against his lips and nodded.

"Sorry." Katniss mumbled.

"I would have done the same thing if I were in your position. You went thru hell; nobody expects you to be skipping in a field of flowers at the moment." Gale told her.

"We'd better find the others; they might think you've lost your touch." Katniss told her partner reluctantly pulling out of his grasp.

"Prim hurry up! You're going to be late." Mrs. Everdeenee called her youngest daughter as she cooked several eggs for breakfast.

"Where's Katniss?" Prim asked as she dashed into the kitchen with her shoe laces dangling dangerously around her feet.

"Shoe laces, Prim. You could fall and break something." Mrs. Everdeenee reprimanded, "I'm not sure. She probably left early to the woods."

"Did she come home last night? I didn't hear her." Prim asked again.

"She came in well after you went to bed. I told her not to wake you."

"Oh." Was all Prim could answer. A month had now passed since Katniss had come home, and everyday she seemed more distant to Katniss, which scared Prim greatly. This was the first day she hadn't been home to take her to school, and Katniss' whereabouts plagued Prim's mind all that day.

It wasn't until Katniss didn't pick Prim up from school that she really began to fret. Knowing better to let any one of the Hawthornes or Everdeenees walk alone, Rory walked Posy home before Vick and Rory walked Prim home.

"I don't get it." Prim confided in the boys, "She never says anything. She used to tell me all kinds of things, but now she won't say a word about what's going on with her. If I ask, she just says, 'nothing, Little Duck'. It's so stupid!"

"Its not like Katniss was ever a chatterbox. Maybe she doesn't know how to tell anyone. I'll talk to Gale tonight, maybe he can help." Rory promised.

"Thank you." Prim accepted.

"Where does she go?" Vick asked.

"Woods, I expect. I'm not really sure." Prim answered.

"Mom said that after you loose someone you really love, a part of you dies with them. She was in love with Peeta." Vick pointed out.

"I don't know. She never wanted to love anybody, never wanted to get married or have kids." Prim reminded.

"So? She could have." Vick countered.

"Do you think she will come back?" Prim asked hesitantly.

"I think you should give her time. It's only been a month." Rory consoled as they reached the Victor's Village.

"Well, thanks for the advice and walk home." Prim smiled at the boys before turning to her home.

"No problem, see you tomorrow." Rory answered.

When the clock struck eight pm, and Katniss had not been seen by Prim or her mother, Prim decided to seek Gale's help; if she was in the woods, he could find her. The cool fall air nipped at Prim's bare cheeks and hands as she half walked half ran to the Hawthorne home. As soon as she reached the desired house, she hammered wildly on the door until a very alarmed Hazelle swung open the door.

"Prim?" Hazelle asked in surprise, "What happened?"

"I can't- I can't find- find Katniss." Prim blurted between ragged breaths as tears threatened to spill.

"What do you mean, you can't find her?" Gale asked appearing in the kitchen as Hazelle helped Prim into a chair.

"She's been gone all day. She didn't take me to school or pick me up afterwards, and nobody has seen her since very late last night." Prim answered, "Do the Peacekeepers have her? She could be de-"

"No," Gale's sharp voice silenced Prim, "She is not dead. She's survived worse. I'll go check the woods, ok? She'll be back before you know it." Prim nodded silently, and Gale, still in his coal covered clothes from work, hurried outside into the cold air.

"Come here, dear." Hazelle opened her arms from Prim, who stepped into them gratefully. Tears freely spilled from Prim's eyes as her fear for Katniss grew increasingly. "Believe it or not, I knew Haymitch before he became victor. I knew him more than I knew Maysilee, but that's besides the point. He was a very free spirit, but very intelligent. He was a town kid, you know. He didn't care though. He and my husband were the greatest of friends. Much like Katniss and Gale, very close. I got into their club because I was dating Tolan, my husband. About six weeks before the Quarter Quell, Haymitch sucked up the courage to ask Maysilee out. She said yes, obviously and only one other time have I seen a couple so perfect for each other."

"Then they were reaped. And Haymitch has never been the same since. Tolan and I tried everything, but by the time we graduated, he hardly left his home in the Victor Village. His family was killed shortly after that in a house fire. Loosing the love of his life and his family was too much for him. It wasn't his fault, or those that died. I should have worked harder to keep him together. But I had other things that I considered more important. Point is, Prim, as much as you may try, you may never be able to bring Katniss back to what she was, but you _can_ help the girl we have now. The games changed her, but she's still there. Don't give up on her just yet." Hazelle finished her story.

"I had no idea. I just thought he was always like that." Prim whispered, her tears subsided.

"No, he was very different. I know this is very difficult at the moment. Katniss has always been there for you, helping you survive, now you have to help her. It may not be the best thing in the world, but I can assure you, it will get better." Hazelle promised.

"Hazelle?" Prim asked finding comfort in Hazelle's bony shoulder.

"Yes?" Hazelle asked kindly.

"You said you have only ever seen a couple as perfect for each other. Who are the other two?" Prim asked. Hazelle smiled brightly, and laughed slightly.

"Now, don't go telling them, alright? They need to figure it out themselves." Hazelle told Prim in mock sternness.

"Promise." Prim smiled.

"It's Gale and Katniss. Ever since I met her, I knew they would someday fall in love." Hazelle confessed with a youthful smile.

"No way." Rory scoffed from his position from the doorway.

"Oh? And why not?" Hazelle asked unfazed by Rory's eavesdropping.

"Well, because, because don't you think one of them would have said something by now?" Rory asked.

"Not necessarily." Hazelle answered.

"Katniss doesn't want to fall in love or get married or have kids. She's been saying that for ages now." Prim backed up Rory.

"People don't just decide to fall in love, dearies. It happens." Hazelle laughed.

"How did you and Dad fall in love? Did you know when you first met him?" Rory asked taking a seat on his mother's vacant side.

"Oh, goodness no! I hated his guts for years." Hazelle replied putting an arm around her boy. "Your father was the biggest prankster in the school for pretty much all his school days. I first met him when he put –oh I can't remember what it was- in the hand soap of the girl's bathroom. I had bright yellow hands for a week! I figured out who it was pretty quick, and being the tough third grader I was, I was going to give him a taste of his own medicine instead of turning him in."

"How did that go?" Rory asked with a snicker.

"Terrible, actually. I hated him up until we were sixteen. Then all of the sudden, he was tall and handsome, with muscles and the most gorgeous eyes imaginable. Gale is the spitting image of Tolan when Tolan was his age. Anyways, he lived next door, and I always managed to be free of chores every time he had to split wood." Hazelle gave her listeners a suggestive look before continuing, "He was hot." Prim and Rory shared similar giggles at Hazelle's last statement. "So it was getting close to the Harvest Dance, and plenty of girls were being asked. So, guess what happened?"

"He asked you!" Rory suggested.

"Was it sweet and romantic?" Prim asked.

"Nope." Hazelle answered popping the 'p'. "He never asked me. But at the dance, he did ask me to dance, which I found out later was a bet from Haymitch. We danced the night away, and after it was over, he walked me home, and something just clicked for us." Hazelle's eyes distanced for a moment as she reminisced. "When we graduated, he proposed and we were married six months later. I was twenty when Gale was conceived, and that's what happened."

"You hated Dad?" Rory asked half unbelieving and half in a taunting manner.

"He wasn't exactly the nicest boy around." Hazelle defended. A series of sharp knocks pulled the three out of their thoughts.

"That's the back door, I'll get it." Rory offered standing up.

"No, that's ok, I'll get it." Hazelle smiled at her son, but firmly pressed him into his seat. Something was wrong, and she was not about to let Rory have to hear of it first. Despite their attempts to listen into the conversation, Prim and Rory could only hear a quick series of whispers. The door then closed, and Hazelle gave Prim a 'be brave' smile.

~Two Hours Earlier~

Everything around Katniss brought back memories of the Capital, mostly the Victor house and the woods. The woods that were her home. She could no longer hunt without being haunted by the area. She tried desperately to force herself to hunt again without running away. Sundays were Gale's only day off, and even though she desperately wanted to spend it with him, she couldn't bear the thought of not being able to hunt with him. Letting him know she was broken. Broken was such a harsh word. Yet it was true. She was broken.

The Capital was always watching her, waiting for her to screw up so they could punish her. Haymitch had already pointed out her house wasn't safe, and her the tracker in her arm was most likely working. The tracker…

She didn't know how long it was that she stared at her left forearm, where the track was injected into her arm. It was a small chip, and she could almost see it leering at her. And suddenly, she pulled her hunting knife from her belt, and cleanly slit her forearm making deep crimson steams of blood exit her body rapidly.

"Don't bleed, I need to see it!" Katniss shouted at herself angrily. The dim moonlight was barely enough for her to see her movements, but she knew where it lay, so pushed her pointer figure into her wrist until she located the miniature chip, and successfully retrieved it. By this point, she was dizzy, and had lost a large amount of blood. Not bothering to apply any kind of pressure to her wound, Katniss laid on the rock she shared with Gale all those blissful times in the woods. She began to drift in and out of reality, and she realized that she was going to die. Before the games, she would have fought to keep herself alive for Prim. But now, now she was just a way to kill Prim and Gale. She didn't need to be here. Not anymore. With the moonlight staring down on her Capital crafted skin, Katniss Everdeenee accepted death with open arms.


	2. Chapter 2

Gale Hawthorne has never displayed his fear publicly. Except for tonight when he sprinted towards the electric fence and ducked under without listening for a soft hum. Haphazardly he ran through the woods not caring who heard him scream Katniss' name repeatedly. Panic set in further, if possible, when he saw her body laid across their rock, her arm dangling with a soft sheen covering it.

"Katniss wake up!" Gale pleaded as he slid to his knees at her side. After no sign of hearing such a request, Gale inspected her arm to see a large gash running from her wrist to almost her elbow. Swearing under his breath, Gale ripped off a section of Katniss' shirt (his own was covered in coal dust), wrapped and tied it tightly around her wound, then gracefully lifted her into his arms before half running to the Victor Village.

Part of Gale, the part responsible for his quick pace, told him she could make it. True, he did not know how much blood she had lost, but he did know she was well fed, young and healthy making her body more adaptable to the blood loss than the Katniss he knew before the games. The other part of Gale, the more logical side, told him that her chances of survival were close to nothing. She had been lying on that rock for who knows how long with an arm dripping blood. Obvious to Gale, she had attempted to take her life, and if Gale knew anything about Katniss, it was she always made sure her jobs were finished.

Without bothering to knock, Gale pushed open the back door to the Everdeen household and carried the still unconscious Katniss into the house. Mrs. Everdeen greeted him with a slight shocked expression that went unnoticed.

"Get her on the table," Mrs. Everdeen instructed as she quickly removed the flowerpot, filled with fresh picked wild flowers Prim had undoubtedly picked earlier, from the dining table to make room for her daughter's body. While Gale began unwrapping his slightly clumsily wrap, Mrs. Everdeen wasted no time in finding her medical kit. "Tell me everything you know so far." She ordered softly viewing the open wound for herself.

"I found her on our rock." Gale began, "She was just laying there, her arm was dangling off it. I don't know how long she was there, but there was wet blood still around her wound when I got there. She was already unconscious and she never woke on the way here."

"Fresh blood is good. Means she didn't clot by then, which means she wasn't out for that long before you got to her. She still has lost a lot of blood." Mrs. Everdeen began threading a needle, "Get a bowl of warm water from the tap and a clean cloth. There should be alcohol on the top shelf above the oven, get one bottle."

Nodding, Gale found first the bottle of alcohol and cloth before finding a medium sized bowl and filling it with warm tap water. Wordlessly, Mrs. Everdeen took the items and cleaned the wound, ending with a rinse of alcohol into the now bloody water.

"Her body is going to flinch," Mrs. Everdeen explained after cleaning the needle with alcohol, "You need to hold her arm at her hand and elbow. I don't want her moving that much."

True to her word, Katniss' body did flinch several times as the needle slid in and out of her skin on either side of the slash. Gale for one could not believe how calm Mrs. Everdeen was about the operation. Despite skinning and dissecting animals for most of his life, Gale's stomach churned several times.

Ten neat even stiches later, Mrs. Everdeen wrapped her wound with gauze and began cleaning up the tools. Gale, unsure of what to do, stayed by Katniss' side half hoping she would magically wake up.

"She tried to kill herself, didn't she?" Gale finally asked the question on his mind ever since he lifted her into his arms that night. He desperately hoped she would tell him that that was a ridiculous idea. Katniss would never try to take her life.

"It's hard to say for sure right now." Mrs. Everdeen replied in a strictly medical tone, "All the conclusions look that way."

Gale nodded at her response, swallowing the lump that resided in his throat. It was like a wave suddenly crashed over him. Every effort he had attempted in bringing Katniss back to normal were all in vein. Nothing would matter if she died. When she dies.

"If you would be ever so kind, would you please walk Prim home? I'm assuming she is still at your home." Mrs. Everdeen asked.

"Course." Gale nodded, and left giving Katniss' hand one last slight squeeze.

Gale pondered his options as he approached his home, making sure to stay out of eyesight of Peacekeepers. He could open the back door and have Prim see his shirt covered in blood. If he knocked, his mother would answer the door (he hoped) and let Prim know Katniss was alive before her brain jumped to conclusions. He decided on the back door entrance, and upon his approach knocked softly as not to startle his mother.

True to his thought, Hazelle answered the door, and met Gale's blood soaked shirt with alarm.

"She's alive." Gale whispered giving his best to comfort his mother's ideas.

"How alive is alive?" Hazelle asked softly, silently praying Prim would not have to loose another family member.

"She lost a lot of blood, but she's stitched up now." Gale hesitated slightly before adding, "I found her unconscious and she hasn't woken up yet."

Hazelle squeezed her son's drooped shoulders for support before turning to Prim in her best "be brave" look.

"Katniss is going to be alright, hun." Hazelle told Prim softly, "Gale is going to take you home now." Prim gave an audible sigh of relief as she stood from her chair and walking to the doorway. Upon noticing Gale's shirt, she gasped slightly.

"That's hers, isn't it?" Prim asked weakly.

"She's going to be just fine, don't worry." Hazelle told Prim sternly as she pulled her into a tight embrace. "She's going to need you more than ever now. She's going to need all of us." Hazelle looked pointedly at Gale.

"Thank you for everything, Hazelle." Prim whispered pulling out of the hug.

"Anytime dear," Hazelle smiled, "If you need anything, just ask."

"I will, thank you." Prim half smiled before letting Gale lead her home.

Gale, too blinded by fury at Katniss' actions, walked Prim home without a word, and returned to his house with his mind brewing. He decided, before he fell into an uneasy sleep, he would wait for her to explain. The next night Rory told him that Katniss was awake and doing fine. Two days later, Katniss still had not see him. Four days after Katniss regain consciousness, and Katniss still hadn't come to see him, he decided to quit waiting for her to show up. That night, he met a particularly curvy blonde at the Slag Heap.

"Hey." Katniss stepped out of the shadows of the Hawthorne home startling Gale.

"What are you doing here?" Gale asked harshly. In the mines the past couple days he had more time to think than he cared to have, and after working twelve hours, he was not in any mood to talk with Katniss.

"I- I wanted to say thank you." Katniss answered taken aback to his hostility.

"For what?" Gale scoffed crossing his arms over his chest.

"Saving me. Again." Katniss whispered.

"Saving you? _Saving you?_ That's rich." Gale pushed past Katniss to the back door.  
"Yes, saving me!" Katniss yelled desperately. Her voice was effective, as Gale turned around mid stride and stood several inches away from her.

"You didn't want saving. You wanted to die." Gale whispered dangerously, "You never wanted me to save you."

"You don't understand, I-"

"Your right, Katniss." Katniss winced at the harshness her name sounded, "I don't know what you tried to do. I'm just trying to put the pieces together because you never tell anyone anything. You wont talk to Prim, you wont talk to me. You just shut yourself away and so when you go missing for ten hours Prim has go run across town to get me to find you. But that's the thing, isn't it. You will never tell anyone anything. You went through hell and back, but we went through hell as well. I tried. I tried to be patient and let you open up when you were ready. I tried prying. But this-" Gale gestured to Katniss' bandaged arm, "This suicide attempt is my last straw. I need to spend my time making sure my family can eat, not waiting around for you."

Silence met Gale's speech. He gave Katniss a solid piece of silence to dispute his accusations, but when none came, he gaffed and walked into his house, slamming the door decisively behind him. It took Katniss several minutes before the shock of Gale's words sunk into her. Slowly, she began the walk to the Victor's Village, Gale's words still swirling around her.

About part way through her journey, she changed directions, and walked to the house she grew up in- her home. Pitch black greeted her, but it was not like she had experienced this before. Before the games, she would rise before the sun to go hunting with Gale. Since lights were mainly produced by candles, Katniss hardly lit one to get dressed in the morning. Because the Victory house was already furnished, everything was set up the way it was when she left, though everything was dusty now.

Staring at her father's chair, she wondered what he would say now. He probably would have agreed

with Gale. He would not have yelled, he never yelled, but he would have been upset and hurt.

"I'm sorry, Dad." Katniss whispered into the darkness. "I'm sorry for everything I've done. I was just trying to protect them. But I was wrong, and now-" Katniss choked slightly as the words caught in her mouth, "Now Gale never wants to see me again, and Prim probably hates me too." Tears started streaming down her face, "I just wanted to save them. I just wanted to save somebody. I couldn't save Rue, and I couldn't save Peeta, but I thought I could save Prim and Gale. But I failed, again. I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry, Dad."

She did not know how long she sat on the floor, but when the tears subsided, she rose and walked to the Victor Village. Quietly, she entered the silent house and found herself at the entrance to Prim's room. Prim truly looked angelic as she slept with Buttercup curled up at the bend in Prim's knees. Katniss sucked in a deep breath, closed the door behind her without a sound, and began telling Prim in the softest voice possible everything.

"…I already lost Gale, I can't loose you as well." Katniss finished.

"You're not going to loose me." Prim whispered in reply startling Katniss slightly.

"I didn't mean to wake you, sorry." Katniss tried.

"It's ok. I'm glad you told me." Prim responded sitting upright in bed.

"How much did you hear?" Katniss asked taking the seat on the bed Prim offered.

"Everything." Prim smiled. "Thank you for telling me. I know that wasn't easy for you."

"I should have done it before." Katniss sighed looping an arm around Prim and pulling her close to her side.

"Better late than never."

"Haymitch and Gale were right." Katniss gave a small snort, "Never thought I would say that."

"The Hawthorne's watched most of the games with us. It was kinda nice to have them around. I didn't feel so alone. Mum shut herself away most of the time, so Hazelle took me in a fair amount. Even had me stay over a couple of nights when the games got really bad. Gale was a wreck though. He couldn't hunt, he would go out into the woods, but Rory and I are pretty sure all he did was yell and cry, because he would come back with one or two animals, his voice would be horse and his eyes blood shot. I'm pretty sure he didn't sleep at all. When he wasn't in the woods or working, he would be watching the screen. The only time he shut it off was when you kissed Peeta. He spent the entire night in the woods that night. When he came home he looked awful. Hazelle told us to let him alone, and frankly he was a bit scary to be around. He was so fragile we were all afraid to say something to break him.

"When you won we had the biggest celebration in their living room, and he was so full of hope. Then you came home and I guess we assumed things would go back to normal. Then you got worse and you wouldn't talk and would be gone for hours. I guess he gave up. It was so scary to see what you had become. I didn't know how to fix you."

"I will never do that again, I promise." Katniss vowed.

"You know I can handle whatever is bothering you. We all changed. I'm not that little girl you left behind." Prim responded firmly.

"I know. And I'm sorry for not letting you know what was going on. I just didn't want you to get hurt. I thought I could protect you. I was wrong, and I am so sorry."

"It's ok. Everything is going to be ok. And Gale will turn round, you'll see." Prim smiled.

"When did you get so smart?" Katniss half laughed allowing Prim to snuggle into her chest.

"I've always been smart. Now I'm smarter than you." Prim replied.

"Goodnight, Little Duck." Katniss whispered.

"Goodnight, Katniss. I love you."

"I love you too."


	3. Chapter 3

_"_ _What if he doesn't take me back?" Katniss asked Haymitch as the train sped ahead._

 _"_ _Silly girl," Haymitch's smile faded into Snow's snake-like grin, "He was never yours to take. He will never be yours. And if you do. I will kill him."_

"NO!" Katniss shouted bolting upright in her bedroom. Breathing heavily, she slowly entered reality. Shaking herself from her nightmare, Katniss threw the tangled covers from her body and made her way to the bathroom connected to her bedroom. Though the sun had not risen yet, Katniss showered and dressed in the darkness.

It had been almost three months since Katniss had cut the tracker out of her arm. Prim and Katniss had gotten closer since then, and Katniss had drifted closer to being normal. Hunting was getting easier, and only on occasions would Katniss have flashbacks. Those days she would return home with whatever she caught before the flashbacks, give it to Hazelle or Sae, and wait for Prim to get out of school. She never failed to pick Prim, Rory and Vick up from school, and she honestly enjoyed the twenty-minute walk of constant jabber from the children.

As she reminded herself that morning, it had been almost three months and she had not seen Gale. She would wait for him at their rock all Sunday, hoping that he would magically appear like he always did. But he never would. His traps were always set up fresh every day, and the game they held taken. Yet, he never showed himself to her. Katniss' hopes of ever having Gale back the way he was plummeted.

The December air nipped at Katniss' bare skin as she walked hurriedly to the Hawthorne's. Christmas break would be starting soon, something Katniss looked forward to as much as the children. She always loved Christmas; the celebration the Hawthornes and Everdeens united in, the feast, the long night of coco and stories read by Gale, the early morning without hunting and whatever meager gifts they managed to present one another.

"What are you thinking about?" Prim asked.

"Oh-I-erm," Katniss was caught off guard as to what to say. Should she admit she was thinking of Gale( _again_ )? "Christmas."

"Oh I can't wait for Christmas this year!" Prim burst, "Rory, Vick and I are making a surprise for you, Mom and Gale. They're going to be huge! And Posy's putting her name to it, but she's not really allowed to help since she would damage them. But we were hoping Christmas could be at our house cause its bigger and warmer. And Mom said she's going to get sausages! Can you believe it, sausages!"

Katniss was grateful for Prim's overtake in the conversation as she did not want to keep thinking about a Christmas without Gale. When Rory and Vick joined the conversation, there was nothing but constant voices excitedly throwing about ideas and memories.

Sighing, Katniss took her usual post outside the mines after dropping the kids off at the small schoolhouse. She never stayed around to see the end of the shift, but always felt a bit closer to Gale just sitting outside the mines, her mind quiet and peaceful. Closing her eyes, her mind drifted to several weeks ago.

 _"_ _Ya ever going to stay and talk to him?" Greasy Sae asked from beside Katniss._

 _"_ _Damn it, Sae, you scared me." Katniss swore at the battered old woman. Sae gave a deep and graveled laugh._

 _"_ _Ya sit out here everyday. But I never seen ya talk to him, and yous two never see me anymore." Sae continued clearly not distracted._

 _"_ _Things changed." Katniss replied softly not meeting Sae's eye._

 _"_ _When yous get at as old as me, ya see just 'bout everythin'." Sae sat down next to Katniss, "But never in my life has I's see nobody like yous twos. From the start yous were connected as if yous were together for two lifetimes. No matter what yous is, ya two are still connected."_

 _"_ _No, we aren't, Sae." Katniss replied softly._

 _"_ _What do ya mean yous aint?"_

 _"_ _He said he never wanted to see me again. He's 'done waiting around for me', whatever the hell that means." Katniss huffed in frustration. Sae on the other hand laughed._

 _"_ _It means he loves ya!" Sae managed between laughs, "I's seen Peacekeepers smarter than yous!"_

 _"_ _He doesn't love me, Sae, if he loved me then he would want to see me." Katniss half yelled._

 _"_ _But that's why he loves ya, dearie." Sae whispered as if it was the secret to life. "It's too painful to see you."_

 _"_ _That's ridiculous. I think you've eaten too much of your stew today, Sae."_

 _"_ _Just yous wait and see." Sae smiled standing up, "Just yous wait and see."_

Truth was, ever since that conversation, Katniss had been waiting, and so far all she could see was coal dust and grey skys. Around lunch time, Katniss made her way to the Hob to buy lunch from Greasy Sae. She enjoied her lunches with Sae, it gave her a chance to visit, and give Sae enough business to keep her open. Walking across town, a distant scream caught Katniss' ear, and looking towards the voice, she could see dark smoke billowing from the Seam. Panic caught Katniss' throat and she began racing towards the fire. She was not the only one, as several others yelled to their friends and neighbors. Reaching the scene, she saw Hazelle holding as sobbing Posy close to her as their home blazed in the grey cold day.

"Hazelle!" Katniss yelled running next to her. "Are you guys hurt?"

"No," Hazelle smiled gratefully, "We got out just in time. Even managed to grab the keep box." She gestured to a small crate that held a few items, baby cloths, a few pictures and a wooden box.

"Thank the heaves." Katniss whispered as the roof crumbled with a loud bang causing both Katniss and Hazelle to jump and Posy to whimper.

Hazelle, Posy and Katniss stayed until the fire was put out leaving a charred frame. From the damages they could see, nothing inside the house made it in the fire. The cabinets had long since broken leaving it's containments to crash to the floor. All that was left was the floor and support beams. When Posy wasn't looking, Hazelle quickly wiped a small tear from her eye.

"You guys can stay with us, we have plenty of room." Katniss offered giving Hazelle what she hoped was an encouraging smile.

"That is very generous of you, Katniss." Hazelle began.

"Nonsense, I know we aren't technically family, but you have always taken care of myself, and Gale took care of Prim and my mother when I couldn't, and I know he would have continued to do so. You are like family to me, to us, and we wouldn't have it any other way. Besides, winter is almost here, and you can't survive this cold without proper shelter."

"Thank you." Hazelle smiled pulling Katniss into a tight embrace. Katniss recognized Hazelle's grip similar to Gale's and suddenly began to think about the boys who had no idea their home was destroyed along with all of their possessions.

"Come on, we don't want you two getting sick in this cold." Katniss lifted the keep box and lead Posy and Hazelle to the Victor Village.

Mrs. Everdeen, upon hearing the tragedy, immediately made hot tea for everyone and began instructing Katniss to move Katniss' things into Prim's room and clear the guest bedroom. It was quickly decided that Posy and Hazelle would take the guest bedroom, Prim and Katniss would share Prim's room, Mrs. Everdeen would keep her room, and the boys would share Katniss' room since it was bigger and was closer to the master bath, a convenience for Gale. It wasn't until Mrs. Everdeen mentioned Gale and his work schedule that Katniss realized Gale would be living here. That she would be forced to see him everyday, maybe even talk to him. Would he hate her for inviting his family into moving here? Would he blame her?

Those questions plagued her as she and Mrs. Everdeen prepared the rooms while Posy and Hazelle retrieved the children from school and break the news to them. By dinner time, Katniss was visibly shaking with anxiety. At dusk, Rory and Vick offered to pick Gale up from the mines, and with Hazelle's nod of approval, Katniss waited with bated breath for Gale to arrive.

One thing Katniss knew for sure, was life was about to change drastically.


	4. Chapter 4

The boys returned solemn with Gale right behind them. Katniss could see the effort it took Gale to put a large smile on his face, the pain in his eyes when he swung Posy up and the overall exhaustion the mines forced upon his body. She knew he had taken more time, as did most of the miners, but it wasn't until now that Katniss realized just how much the mines had taken Gale away. She could feel Gale's eye her at different moments when her back was turned, but she ignored him the best she could.

Being the gentleman he was, Gale thanked Mrs. Everdeen, Prim and Katniss, to which Katniss responded with a "oh it was nothing" that would have made Effie beam with pride. It wasn't until Mrs. Everdeen and Hazelle took the kids upstairs to get ready for bed that Katniss let her guard slip, and by the looks of his actions, Gale followed suit.

"I really do appreciate what you are doing for my family." Gale began his body slumping showing Katniss just how exhausted he was. "We could never scrape up the money to buy a new place."

"We agreed to keep each other's families alive, that's all I'm doing." Katniss answered pulling out a bowl of cooked meat and setting it down in front of Gale.

"You didn't have to. There was no obligation." Gale replied softly forcing himself not to eat the meat in front of him. "And you certainly don't have to feed me."

"You're right. I don't. But I'm sure as hell not watching you kill yourself by working and then not eating more than a few scraps. As long as you are living under my roof, you are going to eat." Katniss finalized. She wasn't sure if Gale's body couldn't resist any longer, or her tone was strong enough for Gale not to fight, but either way, Gale gave her a soft smile and began eating the meat.

Willing herself not to let any of the Hawthornes, especially Gale, that her nightmares still plagued her, Katniss kept herself awake throughout the night. Until an hour or so before dawn she flicked thru television programs with the volume so soft she could barely hear it. After being unable to watch anymore television, Katniss rose and began preparing breakfast. She knew that nobody would be awake for several hours, but the idea that she was keeping herself occupied was enough to settle her brain.

"Oh," Gale's voice startled Katniss at the doorway as she skinned a chipmunk at the table causing her knife to slip and make a sharp turn at the animal's stomach. "Sorry, I didn't realize anyone would be awake."

"I didn't either," Katniss replied softly silently cursing his well hunting trained footsteps.

"I, um, have to be at the mines by 5:30." Gale replied.

"Oh, yeah of course. Sorry forgot." Katniss mumbled unable to meet his eye.

"I don't know how you would expect yourself to know." Gale shrugged.

"Do you have something for lunch?" Katniss suddenly asked setting down her knife.

"I-" Gale paused trying to find a lie that would pass Katniss' standards.

"There are some apples on the counter in that basket, and there are sandwiches in the fridge that I made for everyone's lunches earlier." Katniss told him resuming her work.

"Thank you." Gale nodded before taking an apple and sandwich and placing them in his metal lunch pail. "Well, have a good day."

"Don-" Katniss paused as Gale began tying his boots. She noticed his head pick up slightly waiting for her to continue, "Have a good day." She finished lamely. Gale chuckled softly before adding jokingly, "They haven't killed me yet."

In the next week that followed, the Hawthornes and Everdeens learned to work together, and live together. It was quite an adjustment to say the least. Posy was ecstatic to have Prim braid her hair everyday, and Prim was excited to share her girly items and pastimes with Posy. Vick and Rory were constantly on the edge of 'this is cool' and 'there are so many girls'. They behaved, for the most part, but ever so often, a squabble would occur between them usually involving Prim in some way.

The hardest part for the youngest Hawthorn boys and Prim was their inability to communicate properly. Rory and Vick always told things they way they were, and if they were harsh about it, it would not phase them on bit. Prim, on the other hand, was always sensitive in the way she told her opinions or views, if she shared them at all.

At breakfast that Sunday, everyone was gathered at the table for a large meal of scrambled eggs and porridge. Though the dining table seemed to comfortably fit everyone before, Katniss felt absolutely smothered with Gale on her left. Prim had been nominated to sit between Vick and Rory several days ago in hopes that the boys would behave better. She didn't seem to mind, and they boys in turn did behave with more manners than before. Mrs. Everdeen sat at the one head of the table, while Hazelle sat across from her. Beside Hazelle, Posy was seated, then Gale, and Katniss next to her mother.

About halfway through their meal, that somehow Gale managed to fight sleep all the way through on (Katniss was sure he was going to fall asleep at one point, and "accidently" kicked him under the table), Vick snickered, nodded at Rory, who after several seconds gave an identical snicker.

"Care to explain the joke, boys?" Hazelle asked in a clipped tone.

"Nope." Rory answered quickly turning his head towards his plate.

"Prim smells funny." Vick supplied without hesitation. This comment earned him a soul stabbing glare from Rory, a yell of 'Vick!' from both Gale and Hazelle, and an indignant 'I do not!' from Prim.

"What?" Vick asked oblivious his blunt remark.

"We do not go around telling people they smell funny." Hazelle reprimanded.

"But she does!" Vick defended.

"I don't care if she smells like a barn full of crap burning, you don't tell somebody that." Gale supplemented his brother.

"Not that she does!" Katniss rounded on Gale.

"Hey, this isn't my fault!" Gale threw back to Katniss.

"Well you certainly don't need to give your brother ideas!"

"I'm not giving him ideas! I am-"

"Shut it!" Hazelle yelled slamming her hand on the table gaining full silence and all eyes on her. "Now, everyone is going to finish their food silently. When we are done, Vick and Rory can clean up breakfast, and mind yourself the next time you think it's a wise idea to tell somebody they smell funny. Gale and Katniss are excused from clean up to go hunting. Everyone clear?" Heads nodded in response before turning to their food.

"I, um, I can do the hunting myself." Katniss told Hazelle softly. Hazelle raised her eyebrow sharply and Katniss felt as if she was being called for trial. She hurriedly added, "But I would love the help."

A few silent minutes passed before Prim quit picking at her food and asked to be excused. Immediately Katniss rose and followed Prim out of the kitchen. As soon as they were in the living room, tears began spilling from Prim's eyes.

"What's up, Little Duck?" Katniss asked softly wrapping her arms around her sister.

"I do smell." Prim choked out.

"No you don't. Vick and Rory were just picking on you." Katniss replied firmly.

"No, I woke up and had blood in my bed, so I took a few old cloths and put them in my underwear this morning, but I reek of blood and I can stop it!" Prim cried.

"Oh, Prim, that's perfectly normal." Katniss cooed wondering when her little sister became old enough to start her period.

"I know; I just didn't think they could smell it!" Prim sobbed.

"Just wait a second," Katniss told her sister before reentering the kitchen.

"Everything alright?" Hazelle asked softly as Katniss grabbed for a few herbs.

"Yeah, Prim's just a bit unsettled, but she'll be fine." Katniss replied with a half smile. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Vick lower his head, and it gave her a small bounce in her step knowing Vick would not be pointing out Prim's flaws anytime soon.

Without a word, Katniss grabbed Prim's hand and lead her to the upstairs bathroom. Prim watched curiously as Katniss ground Lavender, and Aloe in her hand until a soft paste was produced.

"Here," Katniss whipped the concoction into Prim's hand, "This will keep the smell at bay. I use it all the time when I have to hunt. The animals smell the blood and keep away, so I had a terrible time hunting before I figured this out. Just rub this into the outside of your underwear and it should keep you smelling clean all day."

"Thanks, Katniss." Prim smiled at her sister.

"Anytime, Little Duck."

"How's Prim?" Gale asked as their silent walk to the fence became unbearable.

"Fine."

"Good."

"Yep." Several more minutes of silence followed.

"So your mother has quite the eye." Katniss offered.

"Yeah, has to keep all of us together somehow."

"You didn't have to come out here."

"I missed the woods, to be honest."

"Oh, I- I didn't realize. Sorry."

"Not your fault." Gale sighed.

"I can stay back and hunt later." Katniss offered.

"No, its fine."

Silence.

"You're still allowed to hate me. You don't have to pretend around me." Katniss told the air around them. Gale half stopped and stared at her as if she had multiple heads.

"I don't hate you." Gale finally answered slowly.

"You hate me for trying to kill myself. Or did you forget?"

"I defiantly wont be forgetting that anytime soon, but I don't hate you. I never did. I don't think I ever could."

"What did you swallow, a poetry book?" Katniss smirked.

"No, I hated that you would rather kill yourself than to tell me a single word, but I don't hate you." Gale replied firmly. They both paused to listen to the fencing for an electric hum, and when hearing none, slipped under.

"That's not what you told me."

"I was pissed that night. I was much too harsh."

"You were right."

"Oh?"

"I talked to Prim that night. I told her just about everything, and you were right. It was easier to know that she knew something, and things are going back to normal with her."

"Good."

"I'm sorry it took me so long to figure it out."

"No, I'm sorry I took everything out on you. I should have taken my own advice sooner."

"Prim told me what you did when I was gone."

Gale chuckled lightly as he pulled their bows out, handing one to Katniss. "This should be interesting."

"I guess I just didn't realize that you and Prim went thru crap when I was gone too."

"Yeah, well, when you're just focusing on surviving, a lot of things get left out of the concentrating zone."

"She told me what you did when I kissed Peeta." Katniss words made Gale freeze in his tracks.

"Oh?" Gale asked trying to act casually, but his voice cracked slightly.

"I'm really sorry. I didn't intend to hurt you, really. I guess I just didn't realize it would effect you." Katniss apologized.

"You have no reason to apologize," Gale shook his head, "Its not like we were an item or something when you left. You can shag anyone you want."

"We didn't 'shag'." Katniss stated firmly.

"Fine, go out with people and kiss them and stuff." Gale replied his anger flaring slightly.

"Its not like I wanted to!" Katniss hissed defensively.

"What, you didn't have control of your own body during the games?"

"Damit Gale, it was for sponsors so I could get home to you and Prim!" Katniss screamed. The two stared each other down for several moments before Gale backed away.

"Just- just forget it." Gale murmured turning.

"I-" Katniss desperately searched for something to say to him.

"It's fine."

"No, its not." Katniss approached her hunting partner cautiously from behind. "Just tell me what I'm supposed to do."

Gale scoffed then turned to face her. "You're supposed to be with me. This whole damn thing wasn't supposed to happen. Hell, I shouldn't be stuck in the mines. But there are some things that we can't fix. Just forget it, Katniss. I'll survive."

Silently and deep in their own thoughts, Gale and Katniss entered the Hob with a large amount of meat. The first time they had gone into the Hob together since the games. Several people the two knew stared at their presence, but it was Greasy Sae who's beaming, toothless smile that over powered any stray thought of uncomfort.

"Well well well. The couple finally reunites. Took you two long enough." Sae teased as Gale and Katniss took a bench at Sae's table.

"We're not-" Katniss began.

"Yeah yeah." Sae dismissed with a wave of her hand. "I'll have you know that my business has seriously been crippled because of you two."

"I doubt that." Gale gave a slight chuckle as he began unclipping two rabbits. "Regardless, we're feeling generous. Two rabbits for two bowls of soup."

"Hmmm." Sae raised her eye brow.

"We're not giving you anymore, Sae. Just take them." Gale pushed the rabbits across the counter. Sae accepted them (obviously) and ladled out two bowls of soup.

"So, when did this become a thing again?" Sae asked with a raised eyebrow.

"We both needed to go hunting today." Gale responded lightly. Sae eyed the two, Katniss intently staring at her bowl and Gale attacking his bowl with an unnecessary force.

"You know," Sae shook her head as if reprimanding a child for spilling water outside, "nobody can possibly be perfect. If you can't handle somebody screwing up once in a while, then your going to be awfully lonely. We got just about nofing here, but you two could be very happy together if you would get your heads out of your asses and figure this thing out."

Sae's speech left Gale stunned and Katniss' mind reeling. Instead of speaking aloud, Katniss looked at Sae mouthed 'sorry' and returned to staring at her bowl. Gale's eyes fell onto Katniss, and he slipped into his own thoughts once again.

"I swear you two…" Sae mumbled before turning to help another customer.

After finishing their soup and promises of seeing her again next Sunday, Katniss and Gale walked back to the Victor Village in complete silence. It was only when they reached the back porch that Gale broke the silence.

"You don't have to hunt with me, you know."

"Oh." Katniss' voice dropped slightly.

"I mean, I would love to go with you, but you don't have to." Gale restated hurriedly.

"No, no I would love to go." Katniss responded giving Gale a quick smile.

"Cool."

"Cool."

They stood across from each other, both unable to tell what the other was thinking.

"We should-" Katniss gestured to the door.

"Yeah," Gale snapped out of his thoughts again, and followed Katniss thru the door where they were greeted with a lively house. Maybe, Katniss thought, just maybe things can be better than they were.


End file.
